bitter/sweet charity

truth is the key to all things real. withuot there is no understanding of anything internal or external. even still, the world is full of these so called 'patrons'. they are righteous and good. they cause nothing but confusion and pain. i mean, what is genuine that isn't infinite. i might also ask what is genuine that isn't temporary. the ends of this spectrum are racing to meet eachother. they rage agains the totality of their tails binding them in a completely different way. we patronize eachother endlessly into nothingness. where is the seperation [*+*+*+*+*anxiety^%^@^*&#} and what is the actual connection? on my way to work some mornings. those morning when i am quick to step out of bed. i am made to walk past the crowd outside the church. they stand there in the rain waiting for food. or as the sign on the door read 'emergency food'. they stare at the sign and at me as i walk by on my way to work. with my umbrella and my sense of good will. and i pat myself on the back for getting to work earlier than usual. it's my brother's being sent off to war. it's my brother's being killed by my brother's. what makes us brother's? the culture we share, the world we stand on? the world apart... what is the sympathetic stance? these questions are not good ones to ask. whose side should i take?... better. and what does it matter. doesn't.
today i go to detroit to watch my dad graduate from college. ha.
i've heard rumors that his step-daughter is a slut. she has sex with all her brother's friends. why do certain people want to tell me about this? should i try to interfer? or let this disaster take its course?
see, the questions can always change. the answers are usually coming from the same place. sex is to violence as charity is to the patron. they are all the same.